Vell's Rainbowfied Life.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

WHERE'S THE LOVE?

Why do people have the tendency to act before they think?

Why do people choose regreting over preventing? Why do they choose to commit the mistakes first and deal with it later instead of thinking twice before committing it?

Why do people tend to forget to think about how others would feel if they hurt them? Why is there a tendency for a failure to put ourselves in other's shoes? Is it plain ignorance? Is it mere selfishness? Or is it to selfishly gain satisfaction first and then try to make everything okay by pretending nothing had happened?

I get tired of always trying to satisfy others. I am tired of always thinking of others' feelings first before myself. Coz all I get is just hurt and dissapointment. Is there anyone who can do the same to me? Who can protect me wholeheartedly? I don't need so much of a physical protection, I need emotional protection. Protect my feelings...my trust. If there isn't anybody who can do that, then I'll choose to protect myself.

With time, the wound in my heart will heal. But don't expect it to return to how it used to be. I'll not be the same person after you've hurt me. I learn from mistakes. And I'll build my own shield as a protection.

Perhaps I should be more epxressive. Or perhaps I should become the other way round, conceal everything and keep everything for myself and God. Which way will be better? I tried both ways. But neither seemed to work.

Human is just a complicated being.

Don't try to find me when it's all too late. Don't show your compassion when it's all been done. Don't tell me your effort only after I'm gone. I gave you chance after chance but you just blew them all. It was easier in the beginning but you just wanna make it more difficult and perhaps challenging. I won't demand much in the beginning but everyone seem to fail it. At the end of the day, they have to struggle much harder to gain my trust again. I gave freely at first, but now there gotta be something for you to pay for my trust. It's not worth it *Sigh*

I don't wanna cry the tears of sorrows anymore. I wanna cry coz of joy instead.

Vell Signed off ♥ 2:10 PM